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Kill a carp

The teacher Lydia Mikhailovna and her former student Zhenya are going to celebrate the New Year. Worthy men were not found, and therefore decided to celebrate the holiday together. Women dream of cooking stuffed carp, but none of them have the spirit to kill live fish, which serenely floats in the bathroom. Suddenly a doorbell rings and Lydia Mikhailovna recognizes her first love in the uninvited guest - Borya, whom they have not seen for 30 years. But Borya does not recognize Lidia Mikhailovna and takes the teacher for Zhenya's mother! Offended Lydia Mikhailovna tries to expose the guest for the door, but Zhenya decides to resurrect his former love and finds an excuse that Borya should stay: he must kill the carp ...

Kill a carp

NR 2004
Like Chef, Like God

Thodorakis, the film's hero, has a happy go-lucky attitude about life and women, but this all changes when he is forced by his uncle to train as a chef. He soon becomes a top chef and is so impressive that he enters a 'secret society' for chefs, who battle it out to see which one is the best. To his detriment he becomes so obsessive that the women in his life find him obnoxious and nothing seems likely to save him until the news of his patron's death slaps him in the face like a cold fish. In the end, the shock reminds him to keep his life in perspective.

Like Chef, Like God

3.5 2005
The Closer You Get

Irish lads send an ad to the Miami Herald inviting fit and enticing women, between the ages of 20 and 21, to live in their isolated Donegal village. The whole town knows about the ad, and it sharpens everyone's sense of the opportunities for happiness already at hand. Kate, a publican with a young daughter, is separating from her husband and catches the eye of a bachelor sheep farmer. Kieran the butcher realizes that his assistant Siobhan is comely, and then he discovers she's fiery as well. Ollie sends off for Dutch skin magazines that the village postmistress won't release to him. The men, and women, find counsel in their movie-loving priest. Will anyone answer the ad?

The Closer You Get

5.7 2000
Sergeant Keroro The Super Duper Movie 4: Crushing Invasion, Dragon Warriors

Mysterious giant beings called "Ryū no Shippo" (Dragon Tails) appeared across the world. Due to the danger it could bring, the Keroro Platoon did a worldwide research on the Dragon Tails, but Tamama suddenly disappeared during the research. Because of this, the whole platoon started their search for Tamama and ended up in Mont-Saint-Michel, France where they met mysterious girl named Sion, who holds the mysterious Ryū no Hon (Dragon Book). But little they know about the secrets about her and the worldwide calamity that would destroy the entire world, as they know it...

Sergeant Keroro The Super Duper Movie 4: Crushing Invasion, Dragon Warriors

5.3 2009
Evasions

In the hot summer of 1940 the German troops are just outside Paris, and numerous Parisians are leaving the city in a complete panic. Luce Ader, the sensitive daughter of a factory owner, decides somewhat belatedly to escape as well, together with her arrogant fiancé Bruno. Since they have a luxury automobile, the elderly society lady Daine Lessing decides to join them, and brings along the sensitive homosexual diplomat with her. The four of them finally leave the city in the hopelessly overloaded luxury car, only to get stuck in the middle of a seemingly endless column of refugees along a dusty road outside Paris...

Evasions

7.3 2000
Mongolian Ping Pong

Bilike has never seen a ping-pong ball before. He and his family live without electricity and running water in a solitary tent home among the vast steppe grasslands. The magnificent landscape here has changed little since the days of Genghis Kahn. But life in the middle of nowhere can be exciting for a young boy. The smallest of details become big events for curious Bilike and his best friends Erguotou and Dawa. The mystery of the small white ball floating in the creek leads to questions about the world around them, as well as innocent mischief.

Mongolian Ping Pong

6.4 2005
Sex Up Your Life!

Ziege, Häschen and Max have now moved to Berlin for studying. They ain't got no money till the mystic plant reappears. Soon they have enough money for champagne, a penthouse and a nice car. But everyone's got private problems. Häschens girlfriend Valerie is in Sevilla, Max is too shy to go into Berlin's gay-clubs and Ziege is in love with the girlfriend of a manager of a big company. But being very boyish they don't just sell the SexUp pills, but also use them for themselves. Of course the old problems reappear.

Sex Up Your Life!

5.2 2005
Troublesome Night 12

Two beauty consultants, Sun and Aki, have been transferred to a new branch in Shenzhang, to be Branch Managers. At a disco one night, a strange man comes to them and requests that they provide beauty service at his home for his wife. They accept the offer and head to Mr. Cheng's house. When they arrive, however, they find Mrs. Cheng is actually a ghost! Their nightmare begins, as the ghastly couple begin threatening the two girls, and their sinister plan unveils itself

Troublesome Night 12

5.6 2001
Lalapipo

Adapted from a sex-stuffed cult novel, LALAPIPO (a play on the phrase “A Lot of People”) follows divergent seedy strands of sexual and narrative spaghetti through the sticky Tokyo night. There’s a chubby freelance writer who’s so obsessed with masturbating to the sound of his upstairs neighbors going at it that he forgets to deal with his own love life and when he finally does have sex he is immediately filled with self-loathing. The upstairs neighbor’s story then splits off like an amoeba: she’s an office lady seduced by a “talent scout” who is falling down the sex industry ladder, moving from hostess, to massage girl, to private karaoke attendant. The talent scout’s story then splits off and runs in its own direction, revealing the sorry state of this young pimp’s soul. From there, the movie takes more and more time to consider the lives of more and more characters until the entire Japanese sex industry is filled with the wailing of lost souls.

Lalapipo

5.6 2009
The Living Wake

A dark comedy set in a timeless storybook universe. Self-proclaimed artist and genius, K. Roth Binew, has one day to live. He has enlisted his best and only friend, Mills Joquin, to take him around on a bicycle powered rickshaw. In a final attempt to probe life’s deepest mysteries, Binew endures one ridiculous trial after the next. He concludes his day with a final performance, his living wake. On a makeshift stage in an open field, Binew’s friends and enemies gather to witness his madness one final time.

The Living Wake

4.9 2007
Get Smart's Bruce and Lloyd Out of Control

Bumbling R&D inventors Bruce and Lloyd get out of the lab and into the field as they search to locate their latest invention - which has somehow gone missing. When you're used to spending your day inventing the most cutting edge spy equipment known to man, adapting the stealth and guile needed to become a true secret agent doesn't come naturally. Unfortunately the invisibility cloak that the pair recently collaborated on has disappeared, and in order to ensure that it doesn't fall into the hands of KAOS they will have to master the skills of a true spy. But how exactly does one find an object that's invisible to begin with? As the search gets underway, these brainy inventors are given an eye-opening crash course in high-level espionage.

Get Smart's Bruce and Lloyd Out of Control

5.1 2008
I Murder Seriously

A cop sets out to find a man who has been delivering too much of a good thing in this offbeat comedy. Police detective Martinez (Jesus Ochoa) has been handed a most unusual case -- a number of local prostitutes have been murdered, and it's up to Martinez to bring in the killer. What makes the case truly unusual, though, is the manner of death; it seems the hookers all died as a result of having orgasms so powerful they were literally fatal. Teaming up with cultural anthropologist Onofre (Daniel Giménez Cacho), Martinez hits the streets looking for clues, and eventually gets some unexpected help from Father Gorkisolo (Santiago Segura), a priest with a unusually deep knowledge of sexual matters. Asesino en Serio was the first feature film from director Antonio Urrutia; noted Mexican filmmaker Guillermo del Toro served as executive producer.

I Murder Seriously

5.6 2002
Dating a Vampire

Eric (Alex Fong Lik-Sun) and Cheun (Sammy) are two medical students who opt to rent a flat in a secluded housing estate, the reason being to concentrate on their upcoming exams. Their best intentions go south damn quick; first of all, Cheun wastes time and acts extremely annoying, thereby ruining any chance at serious study time. Second, there may be vampires in the building. Eric becomes slightly enamored of Jade (Miki Lee), a pretty young thing who lives in the building with her older sisters (Zuki Lee and Cynthia Ho). But after a series of weird noises and the appearance of a man bleeding from the neck, Eric thinks something may be up. He enlists the help of TV occult expert Mister M (Yuen Wah), who all but confirms Eric's suspicions: the sisters are vampires. Worse, they must suck the life out of one good man to cure their aversion to daylight, and have ear-marked Eric as the designated \"good man\".

Dating a Vampire

2.5 2006
Vorzimmer zur Hölle

Juliane Engelhardt works at the reception of the cosmetics company "Winter Cosmetics International". Not exactly her dream job, but better than nothing. But then the great opportunity opens up for her: After dropping out of medical school, Jule is not quite sure where to go. When the long-time chief secretary of the CEO, Annedore Zimmermann, collapses with a heart attack, Dr. Phillip Richter is quick to replace. Since Jules' presence of mind saved Ms. Zimmermann's life, she suggests Jule as assistant secretary. Jules Start in the anteroom of the CEO looks like a ...

Vorzimmer zur Hölle

6.2 2009
The Emperor's New Clothes

Napoleon, exiled, devises a plan to retake the throne. He'll swap places with commoner Eugene Lenormand, sneak into Paris, then Lenormand will reveal himself and Napoleon will regain his throne. Things don't go at all well; first, the journey proves more difficult than expected, but more disastrously, Lenormand enjoys himself too much to reveal the deception. Napoleon adjusts somewhat uneasily to the life of a commoner while waiting, while Lenormand gorges on rich food.

The Emperor's New Clothes

6.8 2001